A week has passed since my last entry, in this week I've worked another 50 hours on the sculpture. When this photograph was taken by my photographer brother, Larry, I thought the sculpture was finished. But I was wrong...Each time I went into the studio I would see areas in the sculpture that needed more refinement. The foundry, Bronze Art in Sarasota, will call me tomorrow to set a time when they will pick the sculpture up this next week. Knowing me I'll continue working until the day they get here. Even after it goes to the foundry, I'll go there when the heads are removed to make molds and refine the front of his neck, collar and tie; areas I cannot reach with my hands and tools.
I've chosen Bronze Art because of the exceptional work they've done on other pieces and for their customer service. Rick, the owner, has been very helpful and encouraging, which are qualities in a company that I really respect. Rick was thrilled when I told him that I had chosen his foundry. He said my sculpture is beautiful and that he was hoping they would get the chance to cast it in bronze. I am equally thrilled to know that once the sculpture leaves my studio it will be in excellent hands. The casting
procedure is very extensive and time consuming. It will take them approximately 9-12 weeks to complete. Since it took me over 5 months to sculpt these figures, a few more months to cast it seems reasonable.
I learned how to sculpt while I was still college at
ASU. For years I had studied human anatomy and saw myself as becoming a portrait painter. I had met another artist by the name of Jim
Branscum, who was an accomplished sculptor and pencil artist. Jim called me in the spring of 1985 and said that he had been commissioned to sculpt a
life size sculpture of three Indian girls and a fawn that would be titled "The Three Graces." Jim asked if we could have dinner because he wanted to talk to me about something important. We had dinner a few nights later. Jim asked me to be his assistant on the project. I explained that I didn't know how to sculpt, he said that he would teach me, providing I taught him human anatomy as we built the bodies at his studio. I was going through a divorce and needed a job, Jim's offer sounded fantastic so I said yes. That year I took only 7 days off and worked harder than I had ever worked before.
Finished bronze on
permanent display at Paradise Valley Mall,
Phx., AZ.
(My daughter Christina and I at Paradise Valley Mall. She was a Senior in High School and is still my greatest pride and joy. )
Jim taught me so much more than how to sculpt. He taught me what it takes to become a professional artist. A professional artist must be willing to
sacrifice many things in life, as well as be highly disciplined. Spending 8-16 hours a day, 7 days a week in a studio is not uncommon, at least it isn't for a serious artist, which he was and so was I. He also taught me the art of possibility thinking and the importance of staying positive even though it seemed futile to do so. During that year I was allowed to sculpt the bodies and large basic forms of the skirts and blouses, but because it was his commission and not mine, I was not allowed to sculpt the heads, hands or do any of the final detail work.
Twenty one years later, as I was creating my own sculpture, I remembered those days and all that I learned from Jim. Sometimes I would hear his voice telling me how to hold the tool and create light on form. Other times I would close my eyes and try to see him in my minds eye as he worked on the heads and hair. Jim always said that sculpting is nothing more than an extension of drawing, I know now that he was 100% correct.
For the past 22 years I've built my reputation as a painter. In the past 6 years I've become a muralist, which is something I've lived for until I broke my wrist a year ago. The well educated doctor refused to perform surgery even though the diagnosis was a
Comminuted Impacted Fracture of the ulna. She put a short arm cast on my wrist that was too tight. Even though I returned to her office three time to have it adjusted, she never once replaced the cast, or removed it to do surgery when she saw the bones were moving. As a result, my wrist did not heal properly and it no longer functions as it once did. This means that I can no longer climb scaffolds, which is
necessary for painting large murals. It has been an emotionally difficult time as I've tried to find a way to accept that my career as a muralist is over. I passionately LOVE painting large murals, the larger the better! There is nothing more rewarding than turning a small composition into a very large painting. I was proud of the fact that I never projected images on a wall, or used a grid to lay everything out. I hand drew everything with a paint brush, sometimes I used chalk. I was proud of being in the ranks of a pure, true artist that had the artistic skills to reproduce what I saw in nature and in photographs. I'm still proud of this, even if If I can no longer paint on a large scale. It has broken my heart to have to turn down large commissions, its also broken my bank account because the income simply is no longer there.
They say that as one door closes, another one opens... When Mr.
Bissi commissioned me to sculpt the headstone for him and his dearly beloved late wife, Dorothy, who had passed away only a month before our meeting, I was truly excited about the prospect of working and sculpting again. Mr.
Bissi originally wanted a sculpture of two hearts that
represented the love that he and his wife had for each other. They were married on Valentines Day 1943, and stayed married for 64.5 years until her death.
In preparation of the headstone sculpture I began drawing a few ideas. I also visited several grave yards, which is something I love doing, and looked at other headstones. No matter what I did, I knew something inside of me was missing. Though I do not believe that an artist must be "inspired" to create, they do have to have intense passion. This burning passion enables me to to turn an idea into a finished piece in my mind long before I start drawing. Normally the passion starts immediately, but this time it simply wasn't there. Had my broken wrist and
inability to create murals
destroyed my desire for creating art? I spent several trying different things to renew the spark, only nothing worked.
One quiet morning, I remembered that several months before I had purchased clay and a few sculpting tools with the intent of sculpting again. At the time of purchase, I didn't know what I would sculpt and I didn't care. All I knew was that I wanted the tools and clay, so I bought them, went home and put them safely away in the studio.
They say that everything happens for a reason, perhaps my desire to buy clay and sculpting tools that day long ago, was so that I would be prepared for this commission.
That same morning, I went out to the studio, opened the drawer that contained the tools and clay. I picked up the block of clay and held it in my hands for the longest time. Before long, I began thinking about how nice it would be to sculpt the image of Mr. & Mrs.
Bissi in clay, then I began envisioning their pose. I knew that it would be a pose that truly reflected their passionate love for each other. This sculpture would be so much more special than just two hearts, which incidentally is fairly common for headstones. I unwrapped the clay then fearlessly began sculpting. The first sculpture turned out fairly nice, so I sculpted another one in a slightly different pose. When I was finished, I called Mr.
Bissi and said that I had a proposition for him and would it be possible for us to meet?
The clay
maquette', 3.5" tall at Mrs.
Bissi's Grave.
One hour later I was at his house with my small sculptures, where I met with Mr.
Bissi and his son, Doug. Much to my delight they loved my idea. They called the other siblings and did a telephone video conference to get their opinion. Everyone agreed that the sculpture better represented their love for each other than the two hearts did. I hadn't done any research on cost of clay, materials or casting, but I remembered from when I worked with Jim and gave them what I thought was a fair price. We signed the contract, shook hands and hugged. I was thrilled to get the opportunity to sculpt and work again.
On my way home, a friend called to let me know a ball park figure that I could expect for casting fees. This amount came to more than my contract and I hadn't even purchased supplies yet!Fear of what I had just singed and the actual costs overcame me like a damn breaking. What on earth would I do now? The high cost of casting, coupled with my new fear of having never sculpted heads, hands or clothing made me feel sick. What if I sculpted the piece only to have the end result looked horrible? How would I survive on no money? I didn't even own a sculpting table let alone enough tools to carve a life size sculpture! Would the
Bissi's cancel the project based on the casting price? There were so many questions and so much to get done that I not only felt sick, but I also felt very overwhelmed!
To be continued...
Tamara
